Rumors

I took two teenage girls to the store recently. As we waited in the check-out line, they were discussing the latest headlines on the gossip magazines. Although I have to admit to sudden curiosity about Angelina Jolie's twin pregnancy, I had to remind both the girls and myself that being part of the rumor mill is never a good thing.

Then, this morning, as I walked into church, "I think I heard a rumor about you" was the statement that greeted me. How refreshing for someone to come straight to your face to find out whether whatever juicy tidbit they recently heard was actually true! In my case, however, I did have to confirm the rumor about my pregnancy--twice, actually--and then explain that we really don't know if it is twins. Darn the doc's office. I really wish I'd already had that ultrasound...

There must be some truth to the old maxim that "good news travels fast." I just wish so much of our media would honor that concept, since it seems so intent on sharing the awful as well as the awesome. I, for one, am relieved that although I may be cornered at church for an "Is is really true?" and a "Congratulations!", I am not likely to overhear someone chatting about me using phrases like "her marriage is on the rocks" or "she is just a terrible mother."

My prayers go out to Ms. Jolie and Ms. Spears, and a few others I can remember hearing "dirt" on lately. My thanks to those who know me for making only the good news travel.

"Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, that it may give grace to those who hear."

--Ephesians 4:29

Perfect 10

10**10**10**10**10**10**

At 10 am today, I finally saw the OB. It is confirmed, officially, that I'm pregnant. Just in case nausea, home pregnancy tests, bloodwork, and the fact that I no longer fit my first pair of blue jeans didn't convince me.

I did not, however, have an ultrasound as I had anticipated. That will wait a couple more weeks. The doctor's guess--"you feel about 10 weeks or so. Could be 14 if you're feeling movement." Movement? Yes. The little flutters that with your first pregnancy you don't even notice. With your second you wonder if you have gas. But by your third time through it, you know you feel little baby movements. I wouldn't mind being another 4 weeks closer to done, that's for sure.

Based on these estimates, the bean will arrive sometime between the birthdays of our two youngest ones. My husband, full of immense self-satisfaction, comments that his timing is impeccable. I'm not so sure I agree, what with all the other expenses we have near the holidays, but I suppose I do have to give him credit for being consistant.

And why not shoot for a perfect 10? I'm thinking 01/10/09 sounds like a nice birthday for the peanut butter cup... Just so long as it's not a perfect twin, I think we can survive!

Boy, Girl, or Golden?

During my first pregnancy, I decided I didn't want to know the baby's sex until delivery. My husband went along with this plan, although I think he was a bit reluctant. When people asked me what the baby was, I used to say that if it was a Golden Retriever I was sending it back.

Once again, I have been facing the gender questions. Despite not having a due date, let alone the opportunity to know the sex, people are terribly interested in my preference about having a boy or girl. This time around, I feel like saying I'd prefer the Golden Retriever. They are cheaper, don't require breastfeeding, potty train earlier, and learn to sleep through the night sooner.
Really, I know 'Retriever' is not an option. But neither do I have a choice in whether I have a boy to roughhouse with my son or a girl to play dress up with a sister to whom she would be very close in age. At this point, I'm just hoping we aren't expecting both!

No matter which, some of the changes in our family will be the same. We will need to purchase a bigger home. Space in ours is already at a premium, even without another roomful of toys and baby equipment! Boy or girl, someone still has to give up "their" seat in the mini-van. And, honestly, what mother would put down in pen and ink her preference anyway--knowing someday her computer-literate child just might find an old blog and wonder if Mom really wanted a ______ instead.

Poor child, if you are reading this, Mommy would've been very satisfied with a puppy. A cute, cuddly Golden I could have named Rocky or Goldilocks and had no one tell me they didn't like the name. At least, I would have preferred that until I knew you existed. Since that discovery, it has taken me some time to wrap my mind and life around the changes that are coming. But, boy or girl, we would never be complete without you now.

Big Ticket

This weekend's adventure was 500 Mile, 3 day trip up north to attend the Big Ticket Festival in Gaylord, Michigan. This annual open-air concert is one of the largest gatherings of Christian music artists in the state. Since I have recently banned all but Christian music in our home, I thought it would be a good opportunity to expose my teenager to the reality that God's music isn't always "lame."

The drive began much later than planned on Friday night, but finally I had my daughter, her friend, and our stuff all loaded. I found the keys, kissed the other family goodbye, and began the 4 hour trek shortly after 8pm. When we arrived at our destination, still alive despite backroads swimming with deer, I simply gave them instructions to not make too much noise and promptly fell into my borrowed bed.

The next day began somewhat stressfully--my first attempt at gluten-free pancakes in honor of meeting my best friends's new beau. The meeting did go well, although the pancakes were a bit of a flop (a flip, my daughter says). Then it was off to spend the day in the open field of the Gaylord County Fairgrounds.

We arrived at the concert during what appeared to be a long afternoon break. We were troopers, though, and spread out our blankets in the baking sun and settled in to wait for the stage to be reconfigured for the big name bands soon to follow. Soon, however, turned out to be a relative word. In the process of waiting, we talked, napped, and I got heat stroke. Never travel sans sunscreen...

Leaving 2 teenagers in the hands of my most trusted friend, and giving full credit to the new boyfriend who didn't balk at the assignment, I walked back to the van and promptly slept off both morning sickness and sun poisoning. Two hours later, much recovered although still undeniably feeling this pregnancy, I returned to the patch of grass we had claimed as our own and discovered to my delight that the girls were having fun, had actually heard some music, and felt my investment in both tickets and gas was justified. The rest of the evening passed pleasantly, and I may even purchase the TobyMac (http://www.tobymac.com/) cd my daughter is now asking for...

The drive home the next afternoon left me exhausted, and relieved to be back home. There is nothing better for a morning-sick mommy than to dwell never too far from her own bed and bathroom. I believe the rest of my summer plans will be a lot less ambitious...

Jesus said to him, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me."[ John 14:6 ]
Jesus is the Big Ticket

Never Alone

Today a client of mine came in to discuss her recent progress on her diet. We've been working together for months now to help her lose some weight and get her health in shape. She's been doing quite well, actually.

This afternoon went a little different. She hasn't been working out--always tired, she says. She hasn't been eating right--"I feel nauseous" is her complaint. She's headed to her OB when she leaves here. She's positive she isn't pregnant...she's hoping she isn't pregnant. "Am I pregnant?" she asks me desperately.

I can't help it. I laugh. Suddenly, I don't feel nearly so alone. Suddenly, we are the in sisterhood of unexpected motherhood together.

Not that I am alone. No, indeed, another little person is sharing this body with me. Actually, I have been sharing my body for about half of the past 4 yearsm thaks to the little ones that already decorate my home. Maybe alone wouldn't be so bad after all......

But physical space aside, it was such a relief to connect with another soul, another mother with 3 busy kids at home who isn't sure there is room for #4. Another person who shares with deep understanding the shock, the awe, the disappointment, and the excitement of accepting the incredible and living a plan much bigger than our own. Today, her dreams of losing weight pale in comparison with the reality of gaining a new life. And she embraces that about as well as I did--with reluctant readiness.

It is an awfully good thing that God promises us He won't leave us alone, either. Whether the quiet whispers of His word to our heart, or a chance encouter with another of His children on whom He has bestowed the same--well, blessing--or the insane priviledge of practically sharing a heartbeat with your new child, today's lesson for me is summed up in six simple words:

"...Surely I am with you always..."--Matt 28:20

International Arrivals

Today's adventure was an hour plus trip with the kids to Detroit Metro Airport to pick up my brother who was arriving from Osaka, Japan. He has been living and working overseas for the past six months, and I was to meet him when his flight came in at noon. (Thanks to Cubbie_n_Vegas' on Flickr for the photo). Noon, of course, is naptime, but the trip down wasn't too terrible with the help of granola bars and video games. The worst part was finding our way through the miles of construction, down side streets and detours. We then braved the "active loading only" area for parking.

As we were waiting for my brother to clear customs and emerge from behind the frosted glass doors, I thought a bit about the other "international arrival" our family is waiting on. At least to me, this baby still feels a little like a "resident alien" in our midst. Unexpected, although anticipated, not quite a "citizen" of our family yet. And absolutely certain to change our "flight plan", cause a few "delays", give us new "headwinds" to contend with, and add new "customs" to our lives.

Our 3 year old is the most excited, I think, just as he was the one most pleased with the prospect of a trip to the airport. Each day he asks me if the new baby is coming yet. To him, the mystery of God's timing is like trying to peer through those frosted glass customs doors and get a sense of when the waiting might be over. When I tell him not til Christmas, he gets a look of pure glee (just slightly less joyful than when big sister bought him the toy jet complete with take-off sounds at the airport kiosk) and exclaims "For my birthday!" If I could take away one lesson from today, it would be a lesson learned from this miniature little man of mine:

Always let the richness of God's surprises delight you.

TSH and Floating Rice

I just returned from my family doctor's office where they increased my synthroid since our "peanut butter cup" has decided to send my thyroid into orbit. Hopefully, the higher dosage will help counteract the extreme fatigue I've been feeling.

We still aren't sure how many weeks the little bean is. Somewhere between a grain of rice and a green grape. My oldest apparently thought I was lying about feeling some movement--just flutters--when she found out how small the baby is. She thought surely there would have to be "15 of them in there" for me to feel a grain of rice inside me. I had to remind her that dropping a tiny pebble into our pond causes ripples, and that when the baby moves, the water in the sac moves also. I think it brought a moment of clarity to her about how a mom is intimately connected with her baby almost from the moment of conception, although I also pray she is in no rush to experience the phenomenon for herself! (Special thanks to Spasmoid on Flickr for the photo.)

I find myself complaining that a baby (or even two) the size of rice shouldn't cause my shorts to be so tight...although I haven't gained any actual weight yet, thank goodness, I can feel things shifting to that low abdominal area we all stress about. So much for swimsuit season again this year!