Busted Blessings

Well, there is a first time for everything and yesterday proved it. God's free hot water heater began leaking as soon as it was installed. My husband and his buddy (who had just spent the last 4 hours installing the thing) made an emergency run to Home Depot where a brand new hot water heater was purchased. They installed this second one in record time, and I had water back just seconds before company showed up for dinner.

I have to say, this all-the-way new appliance works wonders. It heated the water so well we had to turn it down or risk a scalding straight from the tap! Still, this turn of events has left me worried in more ways than one.

My first question is to God: why? Classic question, and one which He is under no obligation to answer. Still, I find myself puzzled as to why He would send us a busted blessing. And my heart aches to have seen my honey work so hard and recieve no reward for his labors.

My next question involves our budget, which certainly didn't have space to spot us an all-the-way-new anything, let alone a water heater. Perhaps God has some other blessing in mind to help us through the hurdles of the rest of the month's bills, but can I trust Him since plan A seems to have come up empty?

Lastly, my subconscious has taken this whole scenario to heart in an unexpected way. I spent an unrestful night dreaming that I miscarried the baby. This pregnancy was as unexpected as a free hot water heater, but so much more essential now than even hot showers and sanitized dishes (and those of you who know me well understand how highly I value those things!). Is God preparing me for my blessing to be busted? Is my baby not quite right? Will labor loom with no reward?

I know, I know, the one has no connection with the other. But this is the paranoia of the pregnant mind. My consolatin came once again from Scripture.

Why are you in despair, O my soul?

And why have you become disturbed within me?

Hope in God, for I shall again praise Him

for the help of His presence.

--Ps 42:5--

My mistake? I praised God for His provision--the water heater. I praised God for His plan--the pregnancy. But I forgot to praise Him simply for His presence. Whether the water heater worked or not, it proved God was here and active in our life. Whether He gives me this child I carry, or not, it is proof that His presence and power overshadow me. I will spend today needing His continued provision--especially with the new strain on the budget--but I also hope to spend it fully resting in His constant presence.